Sunday, August 18, 2013

For The Sake Of Arguing

                                                                      
                                                               
1976 PONTIAC TRANS AM PHOTO



The phone rang just as I was about to leave the house.
Mom: It's raining hard now, so you don't have to take me to physical therapy.
Me: But it was raining earlier.
Mom: Yes, but I'll just cancel my appointment. That way you won't get wet.
Me: You weren't worried about that before. I told you I don't mind. Besides, I made you lunch and didn't you want to go shopping first?
Mom: Yes, but it's too much trouble going back and forth in the rain.
Me: It's not coming down as hard now and don't you think you need the therapy to get stronger?
Mom: Well if it's not too much trouble.

Later that afternoon my mom told me that I really should be more patient.

This made me think about other ridiculous arguments I've had throughout the years. Shortly after I started driver's ed, my dad suggested that I drive to work. As I was pulling out of the driveway, my mom came home. She hopped in the back seat, while my dad sat by my side. All was calm, until I had to make a left turn without an arrow. My dad was telling me to be assertive and speed up before the light changed, while my mom was telling me to slow down. Instead, I got so nervous that I backed out of the intersection and waited for the next light. Needless to say, neither of my parents volunteered to take me driving again.

The summer my younger son turned thirteen was during travel baseball season, so we decided to have a little celebration after the game. We ordered pizzas, and brought a cooler filled with soft drinks for the team. Earlier that evening I asked my husband to pick up a few bags of ice for the cooler at McDonald's. He asked me how much it would cost. I told him 99 cents a bag. Then he wanted to know how much other places in the area were charging. I assured him that 99 cents was the best rate in the Chicagoland area  and that if he wanted to miss his son's birthday to scout for 97 cent bags of ice in Wisconsin, I'm sure that he would understand. Of course, he still had to make some calls just in case there was a fire sale on ice at the end of July. It took me a long time to thaw out from that whole experience.

After all these years, my mother still puts her foot on the imaginary passenger side brake whenever I make a left turn. As for my purchasing power, I'm in charge of finding the best deals on cars and the occasional travel destination, but I never go further than my freezer for ice.


This is a repost from November 2011. In a few days we will be visiting my mother-in-law, so I'll have limited Internet access. I look forward to catching up with everyone at the end of the month.

41 comments:

  1. Hopefully your mother-in-law isn't quite so contradictory with her words. Although I can picture my parents shouting the same instructions at the turn.
    I wouldn't care if the ice was two bucks a bag - I'm not driving all over for a deal.
    Safe travels and we'll see you soon!

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  2. This brought to mind a few of my own ridiculous arguments. I'll echo Alex's wish for safe travel. See you mid-September!

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  3. Alex - I agree that it's better to spend a little bit more on the ice instead of a lot more on gas. Our kids still laugh about the ice incident with us. Thanks Alex!

    Carol - Hope you're able to get a lot of writing accomplished on your break. Thanks Carol!

    Julie

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  4. Hadn't seen that one before, but, wow, does that ring true. You really should be more patient. Geesh.

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  5. My mom still does the brake thing too. Funny! She also used to sling her arm across the seat, in front of the passenger if she had to make a sudden stop-- from the pre-seatbelt days.

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  6. Luanne - I'm working on it!

    Julie - That reminds me of the Seinfeld episode where Kramer "stopped short" with George's mother and everyone thought he was making a pass at her. It's hard to break old habits.

    Julie

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  7. For years I sat in the passenger seat and was a 'front seat' driver..annoying my hubs no end I'm sure. Now I'm doing the driving and he is driving me nuts. I guess I deserve it.

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  8. I can envision her putting her foot on the imaginary passenger side brake. It makes me chuckle. Oy, the petty arguments family members have with each other.

    Thinking about you and yours, with love.

    xoRobyn

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  9. I love the ice story!

    I still push my foot into the imaginary break when driving with my adult children and as a result am asked to sit in the back seats.

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  10. When my hubby drives, I put my foot on the imaginary brake, clutch the dashboard, and hang onto the strap over the window. He never gets the hint. And I'm sure he'd be the first to drive 50 miles to save 10 cents on something -- never mind he's spent more than that on the gas... We all need patience. :-)

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  11. Hi Julie ... those 'silly' exchanges are the stuff of life aren't they ..

    I hope your MIL is well and you can all enjoy the visit .. perhaps you're not visiting as this is a repost!! I need to learn to think sometimes!!

    Patience is a virtue .. I'm told! Cheers Hilary

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  12. Julie, please have a safe trip visiting your mother-in-law.

    Reading your post made me think of the parallel experiences I have had with my parents. Rather than going into that (because if I went there, I might not be able to stop!), I just want to say I hear you, I sympathize and empathize with you, and I admire your patience. =)

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  13. Delores - Your husband is probably frustrated because he likes to be in control. I'm sure that he appreciates all you do. Hopefully, he'll start to relax and enjoy the ride.

    Robyn - "Petty" is right, but at least we can laugh about them! Thanks for being so thoughtful Robyn.

    Arleen - The ice story will be passed on for generations to come! I sometimes catch myself doing the brake thing too! Thanks Arleen!

    Lexa - I do the same thing with lots of "slow downs" thrown in! It's funny how the little things often bother them more than the big expenses. Sounds like our husbands would get along great!

    Hilary - You don't give yourself enough credit, as you are a very patient and intelligent woman. My MIL's health has improved and we are going to see her in a few days. Thanks Hilary!

    Cynthia - These stories all struck me funny, though the driving incident was pretty scary at the time. I even found a photo that resembled my mom's orange Trans Am from the seventies! Thanks for the kind words, but I'm not as patient as you think. I would love to hear some of your "parallel experiences" Cynthia!

    Julie


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  14. Hope you're having a great month. I think I may have commented this comment last time but, enjoy every moment with your mum. I still miss mine in spite of all her 'Oy Vey!' ways!

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  15. Oh dear, I remember those kinds of arguments - still have them, only now with my youngest son. Nothing I say to him comes with out an argumentative response. :)

    Thanks for your lovely comment on Alex's blog regarding flirting. I'm not into flirting - never learned how, but I've seen it work for others! :)

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  16. Those arguments all sound exactly the same, don't they? This deserved a re-post. Hope you have a good visit.

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  17. Rosalind - I know how lucky I am to have my mom. She's also a good sport about starring in many of my stories! Thanks Rosalind!

    Yolanda - My youngest son also loves to argue with me. It must be in the genes. I enjoyed your creative guest post over at Alex's!

    Thank you Lee!

    Julie

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  18. I'm glad I had driver's ed in high school. I think my father took me out driving once and it was a harrowing experience for me. My mother was more laid back about letting me drive so I didn't mind that too much. I don't recall taking my daughters out too many times, but when I did I think I remained pretty calm. Yes, driver's ed is the way to go.

    Have a great visit with your mother-in-law.

    Lee
    Tossing It Out

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  19. My parents never taught me to drive in high school, but I do remember my mother using her left foot on the brake peddle...not the imaginary one! I was 20 when I learned to drive, and my husband was my instructor...now that's another story. Have a safe trip!

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  20. Julie, it sounds to be as if you are an angel of patience! I think I would have lost my rag much faster! And as for being caught between mum and dad in the driving lesson. I shudder. Have a lovely trip!

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  21. ha ha - I can relate to all of that. You were very patient. Not sure I could have been that good.

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  22. Lee - I also took driver's ed in high school, but I still needed a lot of extra practice. Fortunately, my husband was much more patient when our boys had their permits. I tried my best to sit quietly in the back seat. Thanks Lee!

    Sharon - It sounds like your husband was a great instructor, though your mom must have also made you pretty nervous! Thanks Sharon!

    Val - I wish that I was "an angel of patience." In fact I'd be willing to settle for one out of two! Thanks Val!

    Mary - I don't doubt for a second that you would have done all the right things. Thanks Mary!

    Julie

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  23. I'm glad to hear your mother-in-law is doing better. When I saw that you were going to see her again, I was concerned. Have a wonderful trip and visit.

    Fun post. Some of those silly little arguments are so annoying while we're in them, but hey! they provide fun fodder later for a blog post. Take care. (If it isn't too much trouble...)

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    1. Susan - It is all about the "fun fodder!" Great last line too! On another note, you should always trust your instincts. Thanks Susan.

      Julie

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  24. I always love reading about your mom. My mom has a habit of putting her foot on the imaginary brake when she's in my passenger seat as well LOL.

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  25. I laughed out loud at the ice. My hubby has a friend that does that with EVERYTHING .

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  26. You are so fortunate to live close enough to argue about driving in the rain, making lunch and shopping. Life would be so dull and lonely without all the little spats.

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  27. I visit my mum once a year, so all our arguments are over the phone.

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  28. This sounds pretty amusing! I liked reading about this encounter.

    www.modernworld4.blogspot.com

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  29. Greetings human Julie,

    This got me to thinking and I can relate to this somewhat in regards to my human, Gary. I told him all you do is argue He said he doesn't. I get real nervous in our car. In my case it's because my human forgets he's in England, not Canada.

    Have an enjoyable time with your mother-in-law.

    Pawsitive wishes,

    Penny the Jack Russell dog and modest internet superstar! :)

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  30. Safe travels Julie.
    Wonderful anecdotes. Well, my mom never learned to drive... though she says that she wishes she had... no chance of that happening for her now, at 84 years old!
    Thanks for the entertainment!
    Writer In Transit

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  31. Mothers-in-law. You gotta love 'em! Patience is a virtue.

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  32. Enjoy your visit and see you when you get back.

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  33. Aaaaah family. ;-)

    Have a good time with your mother in law.

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  34. Hope your trip to see your mother in law is going well. Sure hope you find some cheap ice. Tell your husband it's $2.50 a bag in Australia.

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  35. Ditto on what Denise has written.

    Something about joints seems to take so much time to heal.

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  36. I, too, put my foot on that imaginary brake! Especially if eddie is driving. He sucks,,

    Hugs!

    Valerie

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  37. Too funny about the imaginary break ;). My eldest just got his driving permit so I understand! LOL. Have a great visit with your MIL :)

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  38. I think I'm forever scarred from having both parents in the car while I was learning to drive! So much for a united front.

    That's hilarious about your husband with the ice. Don't you just love the things people will choose to argue over?

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