Sunday, April 1, 2012

Angst Misbehaving

crying kid sit on white, jeans cloth - isolated Stock Photo - 9479817
Angst is an uninvited guest that may flare up in a moments notice. Toddlers who are going through the "terrible twos" often undergo fits of rage, as do menopausal women.

It is known that both groups could burst into tears without warning, so we immediately proceed to time-out stations. Children go to these designated safe areas where two-year-olds remain quietly for two minutes, three-year-olds for three minutes and so on.
                                                   Angry : isolated angry young housewife with crossed hands Stock Photo

As for the menopausal woman eruptis, her domestic partner responds by quickly dropping her off at the next exit, and then proceeds to the nearest sports bar. He is instructed to watch his favorite team play for approximately forty five to sixty minutes, until she has cooled off or he has run out of beer nuts. 

When his team loses, years of pent-up angst and frustration come pouring out until he has developed the onset of male menopause eruptis. To counteract his raging mantrum, he walks past the pole dancer and continues down the street to the electronics store.
                                                                  A man grasp his head with his hands and with grimace on his face when something terrible just has happened Stock Photo - 9096941
While exiting the store, he lights a cigarette all a bask in the glow of his deluxe flat screen TV purchase.  After his quick fix, he hurries to pick up his gal at the Trailer Truck & Traif  Stop complete with a 24 Hour Shower Emporium.

They return home refreshed and energized. Like the toddler, the menopausal woman slips under the covers feeling safe and snug in her bed. Only she has the added luxury of being grateful that her shower buddy's beard didn't leave a rash. 

The letter "A" has been brought to you by the A to Z Challenge.


  1. Thanks for the early morning chuckle, Julie!
    This is classic... *still giggling*

  2. Funny. Love the pictures to highlight your words too.

  3. cool A

    here is mine

  4. These are apt pictures for what you wrote :-)

  5. Yowza! I need to remember to shave next time I visit the Fuel N Go! Great post! I'm laughing here!

  6. ha ha - this post has me cracking up with laughter. So funny - and so true!

  7. LOL, so that's the reason men think they need big screen TV's! Now I know. : ) Have a great day!


  8. LOL LOL!! What a great start for the challenge. The photos made the post even funnier! Great post, Julie. :)

  9. I see the teenage reaction to angst for a living - nice...or know that it just keeps continuing. Great post.

  10. OMG, this is hilarious. But oh so true.

  11. Funny - the pictures wouldn't display for me - just the descriptions. I find that food helps every kind of angst. :)

  12. Beer nuts? Reminds me of a joke (my God, what doesn't?).....
    "Those new "Deer Nuts" are cheap, I hear."
    "Yeah? How expensive are they?"
    "Oh, under a buck."

  13. Love this choice for "A". Angst. And I thought it was just in YA!

  14. Thanks Michele!

    Francene - Nice to meet you through A to Z! Thanks Francene!

    Thanks so much Yvonne!

    Pa Ui - Glad to meet you and I'll drop by your place!

    Haddock - Welcome, and I was lucky to find such fitting photos!

    Delores - Seems like deja vu doesn't it? Glad to spend our second A to Z together! Thanks Delores!

    Bushman - There's a huge truck stop on the way to my son's college complete with fast food restaurants. a barber shop, and showers. Though I've never taken a shower there, the other facilities are quite spacious and clean. We always stop there for our DQ fix! So yes, do bring your shaver!

    Thanks Mary, and nice to see you!

    Susanne - Glad I could clear that up for you! Thanks Susanne!

    Julie - The photos cracked me up too! Thanks Julie!

    Tasha - I'm sure you're a huge help to teenagers. I just wanted to put a different spin on it. Thanks Tasha!

    Karen - Good to see you and thank you!

    Tonja - Yes food is a temporary fix to everything! Sorry you couldn't see the silly pictures. The first one is a cute little girl who's on her knees crying. The second is a woman in curlers and a robe with a stiff upper lip, and the last one is a man with his hands on his head, gritting his teeth in a moment of madness. These photos have a mind of their own and they literally were jumping off the page as I tried to center them.

    Al - You do have a joke for everything! You are the perfect cocktail party companion! How's that for a "C" ?! Please don't re-write yours - I'm only kidding! Well it's not like your using my "T" suggestion anyway! Thanks Al!

    Donna - Great to meet you during A to Z, and thanks for following me! Julie

  15. I am NO stranger to angst. It kicks in when I'm writing, oh, at least once or twice a day. Great post and Happy A-Z challenge!

  16. Ugh! Is that what I have to look forward to soon? I don't suffer from much angst (yet), only when my meds are a little off! Teehee!

  17. S.L. - Thanks and a happy A-Z Challenge to you too! Hope your writing is angst free from now on!

    Mary - Thanks for following me and for the kind words!

    Nancy - Hope you had a great trip and that all of your angst is behind you!

  18. Funny stuff! Love your blog. Holly

  19. Holly - Thanks for following me and I hope to see more of you!

    Thanks Martha!

  20. I have dealt with both examples. Currently, my neighbor has a two-year-old boy who I have to be Jesus-patient with. He's apt to walk into my apartment unannounced, always wants to play games on my iPad, and screams when he doesn't get his way.

    I was mean. I placed an app on the Galaxy Tablet that has a timer on it. While someone is playing a game or whatever, the timer goes off and an ugly, scary image fills the screen, replete with appropriate screams. lol

    The little bugger won't touch my tablets. Now to figure out how to break him of his tantrums!

  21. This made me laugh. Angst from toddlerhood to middle age--love it. The visuals are perfect!

    Great start to the challenge--will be back for more. :)

  22. I can totally relate to the menopausal woman. This has got to end soon. I feel like I'm a teenager again with the horrid cramps and moodiness. Not to mention the body that burns on high from the hot flashes. Unfortunately, people have a little bit more patience with the toddlers than with me.

    Catch My Words

  23. I believe where we start and where we end are similiar.

    Very amusing!


  24. I haven't quite hit menopause, yet angst interuptis is a common visitor. Oy, I'm really in trouble. My partner should be glad he doesn't exist.

    This was an exciting start to the Challenge, Julie. Can't wait to see more.

  25. For a post about angst, this sure was fun to read. Great start to the A-Z!

  26. Jeremy - I think you're on to something! Where were you when my kids were growing up?

    Alex - It's been a great A to Z day! Thanks Alex!

    Thanks Kern!

    Joyce - Sorry about the hot flashes. I alternate between freezing and sweating. And my moodiness never left.

    JW - Nice to meet you through A to Z! Thanks for following me and I'll be right over!

    Robyn - When you finally meet Mr. Right, he won't be able to stop smiling! Thanks Robyn, but my "B" post is something I think we could both relate to.

    Thanks Nutschell!

  27. LOL! Loved this. Thanks for the laugh!

    1. Thanks for the kind words and for following me Corinne! I look forward to getting to know you! Julie

  28. I started on your F post, and worked my way backwards, and I've gotta say, this one is my absolute favorite. Brilliant, kiddo. "Menopausal eruptis!" You crack me up. Not that I can at all relate. I'm sure I was as cool as a cucumber while going through those ovary-drying years. Just like I'm convinced I never suffered from PMS, either. My husband disagrees and even had a name for it ... "twit week" he called it, but eh! What does he know?

  29. Funny yet witty way of putting into words such "delicate" subjects like how women go about the M stage.Keep up the good work!

  30. I have just installed iStripper, and now I can watch the best virtual strippers on my taskbar.