Thursday, April 5, 2012
Putting The You In Eulogy
The other day I had some time to kill, so I thought it might be fun to write my eulogy. My plan was to keep it short and sweet with a few laughs, and meaningful experiences for good measure. I know my brother would be happy to deliver my eulogy, as he gave a hilarious toast at our wedding, not to mention our boys' Bar Mitzvahs. Even my mother-in-law said that my brother's toast was the highlight of her grandson's Bar Mitzvah.
I suspect that my brother has already started writing my eulogy, but I wanted to ensure that at least part of it was about me. Suddenly, I drew a blank. I didn't know where to begin, so I did some research when I happened upon Eulogies Made Easy. This fascinating book by Margaret Marquisi and Rev. Mark Long promises all of the answers to even the most delicate questions. Below are some of the highlights of what Eulogies Made Easy has to offer according to their website.
-How to write a eulogy for someone you were never close with - and how to make the very best of this situation (and still come off as 100% respectful and genuine).
-How to 'burn' your eulogy speech into your brain to have razor-sharp mega-memorization - so virtually no cheat sheets are needed.
-12 coveted tricks on how to avoid crying and breaking down during the speech - but also when and where it's accepted and completely healthy.
-You'll also receive 300 Funeral Poems.
Well, my brother will certainly have his work cut out for him, between the cue cards for crying, the poetry reading, and especially making the speech come off as "100% respectful and genuine." Hopefully, all of this will be accomplished after many more years of getting to know me better. In the meantime, I've already started contemplating my headstone, which could also double as a festive funeral poem, "She ate, she slept, and after all was through, she made a number two."