Jerks with Quirks

                                                                                                Julie Kemp Pick



 Before my mother met my father, she dated a man who took her to dinner at the finest restaurants, dancing at the chicest nightclubs, and treated her like a queen. He also helped her select exquisite outfits, and suggested she change her hairstyle, choosing just the perfect shade of blond. She was a redhead and preferred her style of dress, but went along with his suggestions, because he had impeccable taste, and she wanted to please him.

They continued to date for several months, and things were going very well, until her first meeting with his mother. They were mirrored images of each other. He wanted to marry his mother. Not that I would expect anything less from my boys, but he may have gone just a little too far. Thank goodness she met my dad, whose only quirk was to mow the lawn in his rust checked dress slacks while listening to the Cubs game on the radio.

Throughout the years, I dated my share of jerks with quirks. They include the coupon guy, the needy-handsy guy, and the lawyer who wouldn't speak in public. The number 1 jerk with a quirk award goes to my  sorority formal date. As dinner was being served, he got sick at the table, and passed out a few minutes later. He didn't wake up until after the dance had ended. Then he looked up at me and asked, "Did you have a good time?"

My single friends are still dating quirky guys in search of the perfect man. One of my friends complained that her date put his soup spoon back in the cup, instead of letting it rest on the saucer. I'm just happy to be married, and grateful that he doesn't throw the spoon in the garbage with the rest of the missing silverware.





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