Monday, April 29, 2013

Yodeling In My Yaktrax


                                                                       


I'll never forget our first family ski vacation. My husband wanted to start our boys out early by skipping the bunny hills, and heading out to the more challenging runs of Park City, Utah when they were three and six years old. While they were learning the ropes in ski school, he took me on some beginner runs. That was when I first realized he was a liar. The green "beginner" runs out West were much more difficult than the green runs in the Midwest, and I was petrified. 

Rewind to my first ski trip with my best friend, and her brother when I was seventeen.  We had a special weekend package in Michigan that included lessons. My first lesson was an hour long and my instructor ditched me after twenty two minutes. He said that I was too dangerous to ski with. I'm not really sure what bothered him most. Was it when I fell on him getting off of the chair lift causing a domino effect behind us, or was it when I couldn't control my speed forcing others to fall as I miraculously made it down the hill?  Later, I fell down so many times that I looked like the Abominable Snowman. People were terrified to ride on the lift with me. Thanks to my blow dryer, I was virtually unrecognizable as I danced the night away. 

Back in Park City, my kids weren't as excited about skiing as my husband was. My three year old even went sleep skiing in between my husband's legs. We have a video of my older son smoothly skiing off of the chair lift, while I did a graceful belly flop into the snow. My boys were quickly learning, as I was growing more fearful. Though my husband was teaching me how to control my speed by turning; the minute I felt I was losing control I would fall down. I don't know how many times my family skied passed me, while I was stranded with one ski in the middle of a snowdrift. I yelled for help so loudly that I was worried I'd start an avalanche. I also yelled out a few unkind words to my husband.

It probably was no accident that he led me to an abandoned run, but they eventually came back for me. When the boys heard my screams, they asked why I was so upset. I told them that I was just practicing yodeling; while I was making an obscene gesture with my ski pole at my husband.


Note: This is a re-post from my first A to Z Challenge in  2011.


27 comments:

  1. That WAS an experience I wouldn't want to go through. Great post.

    Yvonne.

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  2. I think you're extremely brave to even don skis. I've never done so and have no intentions of trying it now!

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  3. I started laughing when I read the title of this post. And I laughed all the way through it. Sorry, but your way of telling it was just hilarious! I won't even go into my first, and only, skiing experience.

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  4. at least you can still repost this and you kept on trying!

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  5. Doesn't sound like you'll be skiing again anytime soon! I've been water skiing, but never snow skiing.

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  6. Some of us are not meant to go hurtling downhill on two thin pieces of wood. I'll meet you over by the fireplace, save me a chair.

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  7. Great post. I've never been skiing before and I'm still not planning on it after reading your post!

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  8. I had a very clear image of your and that day! Thanks for the wake up laugh.

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  9. This was a pretty hilarious post! I enjoyed reading this very much.

    www.modernworld4.blogspot.com

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  10. Yvonne - I was so lucky that I didn't get hurt. Thanks Yvonne!

    Rosalind - It really wasn't too bright on my part. Thanks for trying to make me feel better!

    Empty Nester - I hope you change your mind about sharing your ski experience one day! Thanks Empty Nester!

    Lynn - Believe it or not we still went on a few ski trips after that, but I continued to ski less and less.

    Alex - I've heard that water skiing is even more difficult, so it's not for me either.

    Sounds like a plan Delores!

    Pete - I'm sure you'd do fine. It just wasn't meant for me.Thanks Pete!

    Thank you Lee!

    Thanks Gina!

    Julie

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  11. I grew up in IN, and my BFF and I went on a ski trip to "Sugarloaf." I think it was in Michigan. I had a wonderful time, really enjoyed learning to ski, but couldn't ride the tow-bars to save my life. I'd keep getting halfway up, falling, and having to ski down and try again. I felt like such an idiot. Still, snow skiing is way easier than water-skiing. Don't get me started on half the lake's water going up my nose as I submerged instead of surfaced again and again. Argh! lol

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  12. LOL....I've never been skiing before and stories like this remind me why!

    Great story :)

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  13. Screaming as yodeling--works for me.

    Like Mark, no skiing for me. Too many things I don't want to break.

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  14. Hahaha. I shouldn't laugh as I'd have the exact same trouble if I tried to ski, but it's still funny to think of screaming so much you'd start an avalanche. :D

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  15. Last time I was on skis, I was doing cross-country. I'm too much of a coward for downhill.

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  16. I would have loved to been a fly on the tree watching you yodeling at your husband lol! I'm guessing you've given up skiing?

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  17. Lexa - It took me a while to get used to the tow bar too. I've never tried water skiing, as I know I'd also never be able to get back up. Thanks for the cute stories Lexa!

    Mark - I'm sure you'd have a much better experience than I did, but it's not for everyone.

    Susan - I really was lucky my yodeling sister!

    Julie - Anything is possible. I remember that you were one of my few commenters the first time I wrote this. Thanks Julie

    Bob - Cross-country is great exercise. You sound very wise to me.

    Jen - I'm surprised I didn't land in the tree! Yes, those days are long behind me.

    Julie

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  18. Julie!

    "Yodel-oh-ee-dee
    Diddly-odel-oh-ee-dee
    Diddly-odel-oh-ee-dee
    She taught me to yodel
    Yodel-oh-ee-dee-ay-dee
    Yodel-oh-ee-dee-yodel-oh-dee"

    Sorry, where was I? Oh yeah, what a post and my comment is all downhill from here. Never could figure out skiing. Made no sense wearing what seems like size 47 shoes! :)

    Gary

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  19. I have done cross country skiing, but I think downhill would be pretty much as you describe it for me, too! I can't control my speed, direction or stopping on ice skates or roller skates, so I don't think I'll ever try downhill skiing or snowboarding.

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  20. Gary - My glass just shattered and a chandelier almost fell on my head. Encore, encore, may I hear some more?! Big shoes, big mountains, big trouble!

    Donna - If you just worked on those few things, I'm sure you'd be fine! Cross-country is definitely the way to go.

    Julie

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  21. Too funny. At least you gave it effort. I've yet to try.

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    1. Jeff - I really think I had a guardian snow angel looking out for me. Now that it's warming up, you may want to try water skiing instead. Thanks Jeff!

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  22. Hi Julie .. fabulous telling of the family skiing trips - yup I'm not the best skier either and definitely don't do it now! The first time I went was lovely soft snow in Austria .. unsophisticated and I could fall when I wanted to .. the last time (and 2nd only) was in Switzerland at Verbier - on an ice dome ... I made myself ill with worry! Complete failure and I hated it .. terrified - not even out of all proportion ... so I can get your drift!!

    Cheers - love the story line .. Hilary

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  23. Hilary - Austria must have been beautiful! I'd be terrified to ski down an ice dome too. Glad we both survived! Thanks Hilary!

    Julie

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  24. Practicing yodeling... too funny Julie! LOL
    Well, I've never been skiing, and it looks like it can be a tricky thing... and I'm sure good balance is required... which I don't think I possess!

    Writer In Transit

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  25. Wow, you are brave. My family loves the slopes and finds it hilarious that I wont even try the green run. I haven't advanced off the bunny hill yet.

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