Sunday, April 15, 2012

Nosy Neighbors

                                                                                                                                                      


Remember Gladys Kravits from Bewitched? She was always spying on Darren and his beautiful wife Samantha, who just happened to be a witch. Whenever anything unusual happened, like when the real Benjamin Franklin popped in for a visit, she would let out a loud, nasal pitched scream to her husband, "Abner," as she peered out the window,  At which point he would continue reading his newspaper. Things were never quite as exciting at our house, but she would always find something to stick her nose into.

When our boys were in second grade together, she invited my son over for a playdate. She complimented him on his pants, and asked who the designer was. After he shrugged his shoulders, she asked what size he wore. He was two for two and continued playing with her son. The suspense was killing her, so she reached in his pants to get a closer look at the tag. Then she went about her business.

Later when I asked her why she accosted my son she giggled, "Oh, he didn't seem to mind." I decided to be neighborly and keep the peace, but it didn't last for long.

If she saw me walking with a friend, she would want to know why I was walking with the other woman instead of her. Then she would ask me all kinds of questions about what her husband did for a living, and what kind of activities her children were involved in at school. She was determined to know everything to insure that her son was never going to be left out.

It got to the point where if I saw her coming, I would head in the opposite direction. Though somehow she would always manage to catch up to me even if it was only to take a gander at my shopping cart. "Oh, so you let your kids eat those snacks?  I would never buy those for my children. Oh, I see you bought some generic brands, don't worry I won't tell."

Not only was she competing with me about friends and groceries, but her son started competing with my son at school. Since he couldn't keep up with him academically, he decided to duke it out with him at gym class. My older son held the grammar school record  for pull-ups, and he was determined to beat him. He came very close, but my son won out in the end. I was waiting for his mother to install a pull-up bar in their driveway for our husbands to have a go of it. 

As the boys grew older, we saw each other less often.  I'd still have to endure the occasional jab, "Oh, I think I saw your son earlier. I'm not sure it was him, because he was driving too fast to tell." Then I'd respond by saying something like, "Oh, is your son driving yet, or is he still waiting for his booster seat, so that he could see over the steering wheel?"  Nah, that would have been a cheap shot, and it would've  taken me way too long to get to the punchline. I wonder if it's not too late to install a booby trap in my shopping cart?

38 comments:

  1. Ok, now I have to rethink how awful our drunk neighbors are. At least they will leave us alone. For the most part anyway. Your neighbor...let's just say that holding my tongue would have been impossible! LOL

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  2. Neighbours can be very irritating sometimes LOL
    Great post :)

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  3. Oh my ... that would have been a nightmare for me. I just had people who are nosey and competitive.

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  4. I have relatives like this and it drives me nuts. From now on I'm going to picture them as Mrs. Kravits and just smile to myself when their neurosis flare up.

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  5. I have nosiy neighbours but as there are a few children I supposed it's understandable.

    Great post.

    Yvonne.

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  6. Poor soul...she must be very lonely and insecure.

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  7. we all know people like your neighbor---that picture isn't of gladys is it

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  8. I've known people like that too. Drive you crazy. But as someone else above said, they must be very lonely.

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  9. Hi Julie! Interesting post. I used to watch Bewitched from time to time. Samantha had some interesting relatives. I remember the Kravits from Bewitched, LOL.

    I have no nosey neighbors where I live. We have new neighbors on each side of us and the home across the street is empty. Everyone keeps to themselves.

    Have a wonderful day!

    Susanne
    PUTTING WORDS DOWN ON PAPER

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  10. I've known people like that too. Makes you wonder why they need to do what they do. Either way, it drives me nuts. I'm a very private person...so to constantly have someone watching and nit picking just makes me edgy.

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  11. I have a neighbor who reminds me EXACLY of Gladys from Bewitched haha.

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  12. I hope I am not Gladys. I can see my neighbors back yard whenever I am in my kitchen. Maybe I'll put up a privacy fence.

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  13. I gotta say, I always loved watching Gladys on Bewitched. She cracked me up.

    I have to say I haven't had a Gladys living next door although I have had a few in my life. I dealt with it by trying to determine motives. Some were just naturally curious and not meaning intrusive so I could deal with them and hold back my sigh until they I could escape, I mean leave,lol!

    For those who were the worse side of Gladys, like your above mentioned neighbor, I had some stock responses to dissuade questions/assaults. I'm nice, yes, but don't push it, you won't like the results. :-)

    http://siamckye.blogspot.com/2012/04/mondays-musings-nuances-of-labradorite.html

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  14. Gladys was hysterical on the TV show, but not so funny in real life, eh? We had a neighbor like that, too, and she drove us nuts. Her own daughters got so fed up with her constant meddling, they avoided her as much as they could, so she "adopted" me. The only way I could tolerate her was to keep reminding myself she was lonely. And to bite my tongue. A lot. Funny thing is, now that she's dead, I kinda miss her constant phone calls.

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    1. Susan, She probably reminded you of an elderly aunt. This woman is just a few years older than I am, but she acts like she's from another generation. You were very kind and patient with your neighbor. I'm sorry that she passed away. Julie

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  15. Empty Nest - I'd choose Otis the town drunk over Glady Kravits as my neighbor anyday!

    Thanks Youmna!

    Elaine - It is a nasty combination!

    L.G. - Just smile your Agent Smith smile and they'll be like putty in your hands!

    Yvonne - It was much worse when the kids were little. Now I can't even remember the last time I saw her!

    Delores - This broad knows exactly what she's doing!

    Lynn - This is a picture of Gladys Kravits from Bewitched, not my neighbor that I refer to by the same name.

    Mary - Maybe...Nah I'm sticking to my story!

    Susanne - Many of our neighbors have moved, and sadly I haven't met some of the new ones.

    Valerie - It kind of makes you feel like a little kid again, doesn't it?

    S.L. - Tread carefully my dear!

    Yvonne - As long as you don't have a telescope in your kitchen, I think you're fine. Sometimes the fences end up causing even more problems.

    Sia - I'd love to hear your "stock responses!" Where were you years ago when I needed you Sia?! Julie

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  16. Don't people like that just drive you crazy? You should've started making up some outlandish stories just to mess with her mind.

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  17. Oh, how completely annoying! When I first came in I thought, "Hey, I'm married to Mrs. Kravitz!" but my hubby really just watches out the window and keeps a running commentary on what the neighbors are doing. They actually LIKE is, as they figure their homes are safer with him watching. That competitive, judgmental thing would make me NUTS!

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  18. I absolutely can not believe she grabbed your son's pants to look at the size! There's nothing worse than terrible neighbors, and this lady sounds like she took the cake.

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  19. I'm kinda liking the way Alex thinks fighting fire with fire!

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  20. Your post also made me think of Mrs. Bucket (pronounced Boo-kay...so she insists)from the British comedy series "Keeping Up Appearances" - now she is the "height of nosiness"... LOL

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  21. Your booster seat comment made me laugh out loud. I haven't thought of Mrs. Kravitz in forever! Thanks for the laugh!

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  22. Great comment about the booster seat...I wouldn't have said it either but I would have wanted to. I call my husband Mrs. Kravits :)

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  23. Oh you're bad! Not that I blame you. That poor woman is terribly insecure. Not that that is an excuse. Funny post!

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  24. So funny! A laugh I needed. Seems there is always a nosy neighbor. Love the line about the booster seat..

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  25. I'm so glad to not live near a Mrs. Kravitz. Some people have way too much time -and boys' pant labels- on their hands. I enjoy your quick wit in this one, especially the suggestion of a pull-up bar in the driveway so the husbands could go at it.

    xoRobyn

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  26. I have had a similar experience when my eldest son was in primary school. My son and I were in a competition that we didn't want to engage in. It became very draining.

    Good luck with the rest of the Challenge.

    Judy

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    1. Judy - Oh no that must've been horrible. I hope you both got through it relatively unharmed! Good luck to you too Judy! Julie

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  27. Alex - That would have been a fun way to handle it!

    Hart - Glad your husband is protecting the neighborhood! I used to love watching the kids play outside when they were younger!

    Julie - She needed to check the size and the label! Though she often drove me crazy, I know it could've been worse.

    Jen - I agree that Alex always has the best advice!

    Michelle - I'll have to look for that show. If she's anything like either Gladys, I'm sure I'll like it!

    Judy - My house would've been egged, TP'd, and covered in shaving cream if I would've dared to say it! Besides, I just thought of it several years later! Thanks Judy!

    Tracy - I'm sure he loves it! It is funny when men know more about what's going on in the neighborhood than we do! Thanks Tracy!

    Nancy - I tried to be her friend, but there comes a breaking point.

    Robyn - Nice to meet you, and thanks for following me! It was a lot easier to come up with it at my computer than in person. Though I never would've said it anyway.

    Robyn - I could only imagine the consequences if her husband didn't win! Good thing it never happened! Thanks Robyn!

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